Tag Archives: Dating

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Does Your Date Deserve An Introduction?

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Just about a week ago, my friend Justin Kimpson extended an invitation to attend the Ford Freedom Award event  at the Max M. Fisher Music Center in Detroit.  I was already scheduled to be in town teaching dining etiquette for Deloitte, so the timing could not have been better. Now, we have been friends for quite some time, so there was nothing awkward, weird or out-of-place about going as his “fake date” for the evening; I was actually very much look forward to it.

Since we’re both native Detroiters, went to high school together and still work together in different capacities, we have a ton of mutual friends and colleagues, but since I travel quite a bit and formally live in Washington, DC now, Justin knows way more people than I do. There were several instances where Justin formally introduced me to people who I did not know, which was great. Now, I have no problem with working a crowd, introducing myself and joining in on conversations, but I must say, it is nice to be naturally pulled in and introduced.

I did, however, notice something very interesting that was occurring – lots of people were not introducing their dates, or were doing so as an afterthought. Now, it is understood that perhaps the lack of introductions were intentional for whatever reason, but if you are inviting someone as a date to an event (either in a romantic capacity or as a friend), it is your responsibility to engage them, at least during introductions. It is also wise to give some thought to the type of event that you are going to, and the type of person that your date is. In advance of extending an invitation, ask yourself:

  • Do I even have a +1 to extend?
  • What are my obligations at this event and will I have the time to entertain a guest?
  • What type of event is this and would my date be comfortable?
  • Have I given my date the heads up about what to expect, including attire expectations and any of my obligations that may leave them standing alone for a while?

Scarlet Says…events can surely be fun, and bringing a guest can take the fun up a notch, but without giving some thought to who you’re bringing, if they will enjoy and be comfortable there, and if you are comfortable enough to introduce them to others, you could be setting yourself up for a bad situation and a lousy night out. So, extend your +1 to events with care!

Until Next Time,

SC

Scarlet


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Are You Done Dating Your Mate?

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Photo Courtesy of: ashleyyoung8.blogspot.com 

You’ve found the one – the one person who does it for you. They’re pretty much everything that you wanted to have in a mate and things have gone just magically.

So, your relationship progresses, then you decide, let’s expand our relationship a bit. Perhaps you’ve thought, “well, we’re pretty good people, so let’s populate the world with more little people like us”. You agree to procreate and commence to going half on a baby.

Congratulations, the baby arrives and then something less magical appears to begin happening. You and your mate no longer have time for each other anymore. The baby has completely taken over any of the free time and money that you once had.

This is a recent scenario that has been shared with us numerous times and couples are frustrated because they really want that old thing back-the romance, the desire to feel special or just an acknowledgment of the sacrifices they are making to make the relationship work.

So, what do you do if you’re in this situation? What do you do if you feel like your relationship as you once knew it is being hijacked by your children, your career, your parents or your business?

You’re pretty much going to have to revisit the basics. The same things things that you diligently engaged in to initially secure your mate will have to be dusted off and revisited.

  • Did you once take your mate out on spontaneous dates?
  • Did you used to send flowers or lunch to them without warning?
  • Did you used to make their favorite meal or snack and surprise them with it?

Well, guess what? It’s still OK to do these things.

Regardless of which role you play in the relationship, you have an opportunity to make your mate feel special in spite of timing challenges by just revising the simple, little things.

Your career, your children, your entrepreneurial endeavors. All of those things will always require your attention and there will always be items competing for your time. Your mate – the one that once made you feel giddy, special and admired enough to win your heart is still in there.

Scarlet Says…Take the time to tend to what’s important and special to you. You deserve it, your mate deserves it and your healthy, thriving relationship will thank you later.

 

Until next time,

Scarlet

SC

 

 

 

 


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